Things I Thought I’d Understand When I Was Older- 20 Something Tuesday

Every adult everywhere at one point in time has muttered to a child, “You’ll understand when you’re older.” Yeah well, we’re older now and we still don’t know what the hell they were talking about. Maybe we’re still not old enough or perhaps they were just full of crap. Who knows. So here’s our list of shit we’re still trying to suss out.

1. The stock market. Still have no idea what in the world all those traders are doing waving their hands on the floor or how that leads to a global crisis.

2. Why storks would bring babies.

3. How to file your taxes.

4. Mortgages.

5. The opposite gender.

6. Why it is okay for our parents to let us believe in Santa Claus. (Or why the Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny, etc. are totally not creepy).

7. How/why “bad words” were invented.

8. MATH

9. Why art is something to be graded on, isn’t all art art? (ie- elementary school art classes)

10. Should age really coincide with respect?

11. It’s still kind of gross and icky to see your parents kiss, and mine still promise me that I’ll understand it when I get a little older…hasn’t happened yet.

12. Broccoli.

13. The appeal of Kevin Costner.

14. How older men magically know the inner workings of all cars and exactly what’s wrong with them.

15. Credit scores. Much like our federal system, I have a vague, semi-working definition in my head.

16. How to fold a fitted sheet. No amount of Pinterest hacks can help me here.

17. 401ks. Saving for retirement. I barely have enough money in my bank account for rent, why would I willingly put it away?

18. How some people don’t like chocolate (seriously, wtf?)

19. Why we learned to write in cursive

20. Just like, living. Feeding yourself. Breathing. Being a functioning human being, etc.