Why I Keep My Opinions To Myself

I live life on the sidelines when it comes to voicing my opinions. I feel strongly and passionately about everything: politics, religion, family, relationships and the nooks and crannies in between. I don’t, however, feel passionately about sharing these thoughts with everyone. Does that mean I will fall for everything, because I stand for nothing, as some say? Does that make others think I am less intelligent than they are? Or worse, am I not even a blip on the radar because people think I have nothing real to say? Whatever the opinion of others might be, I plan to stay on the sidelines of conversations and keep my opinions to myself.

I chose to remain conservative with my views for many reasons, the foremost one being that I prefer to listen. I am a listener. I have always preferred remaining neutral during friendly debates I am privy to because I think it gives me an opportunity to learn and make a mental note to research a subject I am not entirely familiar with. I am 25 years old and I am greedy for information. There are so many things to learn and views to hear and articles to read, how could I possibly act like I know enough information, at 25, to informatively tell someone else why their view/opinion is incorrect. And we all have been in that awful situation where we feel well-versed on a subject and then out of nowhere our opposite-viewed friend throws out some fact from 1980 which includes a person you have never heard of. Which inevitably leaves you feeling like an idiot and speechless. In some situations, the possibility of feeling humiliated by some fact lingering in outer space that I am unaware of will keep me quiet.

I am also fairly open minded and respectful of someone who thinks differently than I do, and in most situations, I feel people who voice their strong opinions regularly are not looking for a good conversation with someone who thinks differently. For the most part, I find people are narrow-minded know-it-alls. People who voice their opinions so strongly and cruelly that it offends others or has a high shock value are not people I plan to spend time conversing with (and that is just the honest truth). I have respect for everyone I meet, I try to watch what I say as to not hurt other people, and if someone isn’t able to do the same for me, I am not able to entertain their bullshit.

I also don’t feel that because I think differently than someone, that I am right and they are wrong. I don’t think either of us is “right” or “wrong.” Say we have different views on creation, the president or women’s rights—in my book that is OK. I really don’t want to be part of a society where everyone thinks exactly the same—that would be boring. Personally, I have experienced so many people that have no tolerance for others that I don’t want to engage with them. Everyone seems to want others to agree with them or turn people over to their side and when you don’t, they get frustrated and ugly. Voices are raised, respect is lost and people end up offended.

The other very important reason I am not challenging everyone’s point of view and screaming my opinions from the top of a mountain is because I prefer to walk the walk and not talk the talk. My actions, my life, the way I spend my time show what I believe in. What I live for. I don’t need to go around preaching about Jesus and slapping people upside the head with a Bible because my life is a reflection (in progress) of my faith. If I feel strongly about something, I promise people will know. Not because I am in someone’s face with words but because I am out in the world with my actions. I can be found at the homeless shelter doing my part to help my community, people won’t find me online talking endlessly about those in need, because my opinion doesn’t help anyone. I can be found inviting you to come join my WALK team to end Alzheimer’s, not telling others they are lesser of a person because they don’t have time to volunteer, because bashing people doesn’t help anyone.

And I am OK with all of this. Living on the sidelines suits me well. I quietly listen to everyone’s opinions and don’t say my own and I am OK with that. I think it makes me a better version of myself, a well-rounded young woman. That said, don’t mistake my quietness for lack of intelligence, my reserved personality for a lack of passion or my choice to not get involved for an inability to express my opinions, because that isn’t so. The few people in my life that I do have red-hot debates with, the people I trust, can testify to those traits. I just don’t plan to share that side of myself with anyone who wants to pick a fight, it isn’t worth my time or energy. So for now, I will be quietly listening, observing and learning from the sidelines.