100 Thoughts While Watching “Star Wars: The Force Awakens”

**WARNING: Relatively Major Spoiler Alert + Potentially VERY misleading exclamations of thought**

Star Wars has always been a huge part of my life. The only movies my family watches together are Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, and Harry Potter—so it’s safe to say that between watching the movies a million times, fighting with my brother with lightsabers, reading the Extended Universe, and naming my dog Anakin, that I’m a longtime fan of the series. I had incredibly high hopes for the premiere of The Force Awakens, and have been waiting anxiously for over a year now for this premiere. And believe me, it did not disappoint. Here are the unfiltered thoughts I had while watching the Thursday night premiere of Star Wars: The Force Awakens, documented hastily in my notebook between bites of popcorn. Other than the all-too-obvious “WHERE IS LUKE?!”

1. THIS TRAILER. FANTASTIC BEASTS AND WHERE TO FIND THEM!!!!!!!!!!!!! (tangent, sorry)

2. Back to Star Wars.

3. The opening credits. The soundtrack. ALL THE FEELS.

4. WHERE IS LUKE?! (sorry had to)

5. General Organa > Princess Organa

6. Graphics and lighting are very Star-Trekky. I see you J.J. Abrahms.

7. Rolly droid is cute but my heart belongs to R2

8. Who is this pilot guy. He’s hot.

9. This rolly droid appears to be named VBA? BBA? BB-8? The explosions are making it hard to hear.

10. Consulted with brother. It’s BB-8.

11. The stormtroopers have FLAMETHROWERS. FLAME. THROWERS.

12. Ok no the “give the droid the data” plot point is too Episode IV COME ON GUYS.

13. Stormtrooper has blood wiped on his face. Proceeds to panic. John Boyega, is that you?

14. “I’ll show you the dark side”—Kylo Ren’s cover of Justin Bieber.

15. What do you mean Kylo Ren’s family? COULD THE THEORIES BE CORRECT?!

16. John Boyega takes off helmet. Very sweaty. Not sure how I feel about this.

17. Rey makes dune sledding look very casual and graceful. Very unlike how it would be for me IRL.

18. The crazy tally marks on her wall would look WAY creepier if this calming John Williams music wasn’t playing.

19. Ok rolly droid is very cute I admit it. The banter between droid and Rey is super cute with the beeping.

20. Stop torturing the very attractive pilot! What is his name? I should know this.

21. Pilot just gave into the torture very quickly. No longer attracted to pilot. Pilot is dead to me. Goodbye.

22. The formerly attractive pilot is named Poe. I did actually know this.

23. Wow Pilot is actually dead to me. Like actually. I mean it.

24. This plot is moving quickly. Much quicker than Episode I or IV.

25. Finn/John Boyega’s trek through the desert reminds me of Space Balls.

26. Kylo Ren has a personal interest in this map apparently. A PERSONAL interest. Perhaps a FAMILY interest? THE THEORY GUYS. THE THEORY.

27. SAD DROID DON’T BE SAD.

28. But actually Finn is hilarious.

29. “I know how to run without you holding my hand” YAS QUEEN!!!

30. THE MILLENNIUM FALCON. Cheers in the theater ensue.

31. THE MILLENNIUM FALCON IS NOT GARBAGE.

32. Ok shut up guys you escaped great now pay attention or something.

33. “Why, you got a boyfriend? Got a cute boyfriend?” Lol Finn, you met her 10 minutes ago and you’re already jealous.

34. OMG Kylo Ren you have some SERIOUS anger management issues CALM. DOWN.

35. SERIOUSLY. I TOLD YOU TO CALM DOWN.

36. Why does he care so much about the girl? COULD IT BE THE THEORY?!

37. BB-8 throws some serious shade at Finn.

38. “Droid, please.”

39. CHEWIE. WE’RE HOME. !!!!!!!!!!!!!

40. !!!!!!!!!

41. BAE HAS RETURNED.

42. Talking about Chewie obviously.

43. CHEWIE NOOOOO.

44. I KNEW IT. I KNEW IT. I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KNEW IT.

45. I.

46. KNEW.

47. IT!!!!!!

48. It’s a travesty that we cannot see Lupita Nyong’o’s face.

49. Maz Kanata & Chewbacca 5evr.

50. THE LIGHTSABER. THE THEORY. THE. THEORY.

51. WHY DOESN’T LEIA WANT TO SEE YOU HAN?! WHAT HAPPENED?! Tears.

52. Ok, Finn stop the drama.

53. Despite the drama you are still funny Finn.

54. This soundtrack still continues to kill it.

55. POE! THE RESISTANCE!

56. LEIA. REUNION. HEARTS.

57. C-3PO why do you have to ruin EVERYTHING.

58. “Thanks, C-3PO” is the new “Thanks, Obama.”

59. “You’ve changed your hair.” DEAD.

60. PLEASE KISS AND MAKE UP PLEEEEEASE.

61. “Don’t do that.” “What?” “Anything.” GUYS PLEASE.

62. R2!!!!

63. Being a parent must be really hard.

64. I mean talk about the teenage ANGST they had to deal with I mean gosh no WONDER they have issues.

65. Kylo Ren takes off mask. Has normal face.

66. “I can take anything I want you know.” Don’t go there dude don’t go there.

67. THE FORCE IS STRONG WITH HER. THE THEORYYYYYYY.

68. OMG Kylo with your RAGE.

69. AKBAR. IT’S A TRAP!

70. “Han’s right.” Wow.

71. THAT HUG xoxoxoxo

72. “That’s not how the force works!” COME ON FINN.

73. Guys Finn is actually very funny did I mention that enough?

74. “Escape now, hug later” that’s what I’ve been SAYIN’ man.

75. BEN!

76. HE’S IN PAINNNN.

77. No I’m scared no.

78. No I don’t like not knowing.

79. It’s too easy stop.

80. No. No. No I don’t like this. Stop.

81. It’s dark why is it dark.

82. The sun is gone. THE SUN IS GONE.

83. NO. NO.

84. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.

85. DIE ALL OF YOU DIE OMG NO.

86. OMG Don’t drop your weapon right now.

87. Wow Finn and Kylo are both REALLY bad at this.

88. Like REALLY bad.

89. REY!!!!

90. THE MUSIC!!!

91. REY YOU ARE KILLIN THE GAME.

92. SLAYYYYYY.

93. Literally.

94. Ok I’m sorry there is no WAY they got off that planet.

95. R2!!!!!

96. Oh my god the droid friendship right now.

97. This soundtrack. My feelings.

98. This scenery. These steps. That’s a LOT of cardio.

99. OMG OMG OMG OMG.

100. Say something. SAY ANYTHING.

There are no more notes because there was too much to process into words. So I will just end with this:

Can Episode VIII come any sooner?!

What did you think of the newest Star Wars movie? Tweet us at @litdarling!