The Definitive Ranking Of Girl Scout Cookies

Girl Scout Cookies

It’s the most wonderful time of the year. That’s right—it’s Girl Scout Cookie season! In fact, this past weekend was officially National Girl Scout Cookie Weekend. We are all fully aware that there are 365 days a year which could be appropriately named “Girl Scout Cookie Day,” but since they’re not, I hope y’all took full advantage of the three you were given.

If you’re trying to decide which cookies to buy this year or if you’ve never had any—shame on you, by the way—here is a definitive list of Girl Scout Cookies from not bad to otherworldly.

The Classics

Not Bad: Cranberry Citrus Crisps

Girl Scout Cookies

Crispy cookie, made with whole grain, full of tangy cranberry bits and zesty citrus flavor.

“These aren’t bad,” you’ve probably said with a shoulder shrug. The main downside to these is that you have to be a fan of fruity desserts. You know, there’s the whole “fruity dessert person” thing and the “chocolate or vanilla dessert person” thing. It’s like being a cat person or a dog person.

Pretty Good: Savannah Smiles

Girl Scout Cookies

Zesty, lemon-flavored cookies dusted with powdered sugar.

“My mouth is dry,” you said while puffing out a cloud of powdered sugar. My personal downfall with Savannah Smiles is the cotton mouth I get when I eat them. They aren’t awful, obviously, because they’re Girl Scout Cookies, and GSCs can do no wrong, but they’re not a universal favorite. Plus, if you want a lemony cookie, you are in for a treat (literally) with Lemonades.

Yummy: Trefoils / Shortbread

Girl Scout Cookies

Shortbread cookies, each one in the shape of [the Girl Scouts’] iconic trefoil.

“Aww, this reminds me of my days as a Brownie Scout,” you’ve thought with a nostalgic sigh. Trefoils bring you back to the good old days if you were ever a Girl Scout. If not, you may be thinking, “These were always a safe bet,” in which case you’d be right. Shortbread appeals to pretty much everyone. They’re probably your back up if they’re out of Thin Mints. That’s okay. These classics aren’t always the stars of the show, but they’re delightfully sweet and simple.

Delicious: Thanks-A-Lot

Girl Scout Cookies

Tasty shortbread cookies with fudge on the bottom [each cookie says “thank you” in one of five languages].

“You’re welcome,” you lovingly tell the only cookie that thanks you in five different languages, thereby scaring your cat, who has been sitting in silent judgement while you devour boxes of Girl Scout Cookies. Anyway, these cookies are basically just chocolate-dipped Trefoils, and since everything tastes better with chocolate, maybe you should be saying, “Thank you,” instead.

Mouthwatering: Lemonades

Girl Scout Cookies

Tangy lemon-icing-topped shortbread cookies.

“Should I eat this like an Oreo? I should definitely eat this like an Oreo.” These sandwich-style cookies with lemon frosting in the middle are a great choice (and better alternative, in my opinion, than Savannah Smiles) for those of us who enjoy lemony desserts.

Delectable: Tagalongs / Peanut Butter Patties

Girl Scout Cookies

A layer of peanut butter with a rich chocolaty coating.

“These are just so much better than Reese’s,” you told your friend through peanut butter filled bites of bliss. She’s a little skeptical and now you’re wondering why you’re even friends in the first place. Who is this person that can doubt the wonder of a peanut butter cup Girl Scout Cookie? No friend of yours, obviously! But seriously, even the biggest Reese’s lover will enjoy these, though, because gosh darn it they’re GIRL SCOUT COOKIES.

Scrumptious: Do-si-dos / Peanut Butter Sandwiches

Girl Scout Cookies

These sandwich cookies give you crisp and crunchy oatmeal on the outside and creamy peanut butter inside.

“Should I eat these like an Oreo?” You briefly asked yourself before deciding against it. This combination of cookie and peanut butter is so much better as a whole than separated. You probably compared them to the almost equally delicious Nutter Butter. Basically, if you’re a fan of peanut butter, you’re going to love these. You may also be singing a chorus of, “Swing your partner ‘round and ‘round,” which may or may not take you back to learning how to square dance in elementary school P.E.

Heavenly: Samoas / Caramel deLites

Girl Scout Cookies

Caramel and toasted coconut-covered cookies.

“Sweet mother of God, this is amazing,” you only thought because you were too busy making sure your mouth will never be empty of Samoas again. Literally no other combination of wafer, chocolate, caramel, and coconut could ever be this mind-blowing. If you’re not a fan of coconut, you’ve probably bit into one and then felt your eyes fill with tears as you sniffed, “Why must some desserts include shreds of paper?”

Otherworldly: Thin Mints

Girl Scout Cookies

Round, mint-flavored cookies with a delicious chocolaty coating.

“Why can’t theethe be thold all year long?!” You cried in anguish with a mouthful of Thin Mints. You’ve wondered why York Peppermint Patties just don’t quite hit the mark like the Girl Scouts. You’ve realized that putting Thin Mints in the freezer makes them taste ten times better, and you’ll never store them at room temperature again. You’ve hated yourself for eating an entire stack at once, then realized that you can’t hate anything while the taste of Thin Mint lingers on your tongue. You’re not even remotely confused about why these cookies make up one fourth of all Girl Scout Cookie sales. You’ve found the one true love of your life.

New Flavors to Look Out For

Most Likely to Appeal to A Very Limited Audience: Toffee-tastic

Girl Scout Cookies

Indulgently rich, buttery cookies with sweet, crunchy golden toffee bits. A gluten-free variety offered only in select Girl Scout council markets for as long as supplies last.

Toffee in and of itself is one of those treats that everyone either hates or loves. That being said, coconut is exactly the same way and Samoas/Caramel deLites are the second most successful Girl Scout Cookie. Props to Girl Scouts for introducing gluten free options!

Most Likely to Succeed: Trios

Girl Scout Cookies

Chocolate Chips nestled in a gluten free peanut butter oatmeal cookie.

Unlike Toffee-tastic, Trios may appeal even to the non-gluten free audience because of its generally beloved ingredients. Maybe I’m biased because of my gluten intolerance and love for anything oatmeal, peanut butter, and/or chocolate, but I have a feeling that these cookies will be around for a while. Excuse me while I go buy ten boxes, just to be sure.

Most Likely to be Ignored by Kids: Rah-Rah Raisins

Girl Scout Cookies

Made with whole grain oats, these new hearty oatmeal cookies are packed with plump raisins and Greek yogurt-flavored chunks.

Will this cookie compare with the highly-ranked Thin Mint or Samoa? Probably not. These cookies are sold by kids, and kids don’t get excited about Greek yogurt and raisins, even if it is in the form of a cookie. For those of us who aren’t eight-year-old girls, dried fruit is just not universally loved, and the Greek yogurt-flavored chunks will make it more faddish than classic. If you like oatmeal raisin cookies, these will probably appeal to you, but I just don’t see this cookie sticking around.

Find out where and when Girl Scout Cookies are on sale in your area here.

Cookie descriptions courtesy of GirlScouts.org


What’s your favorite Girl Scout Cookie? Tell us in the comments or tweet us @LitDarling.

 

Hillary
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