Let’s clear the air: most Christmas music is awful. I’m not a grinch for saying this; it’s just true. There’s so may good Christmas bangers out there, and yet from November 1 to January 1, all you hear are the same tired versions of “Holly Jolly Christmas” and “Santa Clause is Coming To Town.” At one point, these may have been great songs, but at about age six I started wanting to put an icepick in my head every time I heard them.
Each year I made a playlist of banging Christmas songs that deviate from the normal, tired hits. And each year my mother gets mortally offended by this playlist. This year I cleaned up my act. I removed Eazy-E’s “Merry Mutafuckin’ Xmas”. I added a version of “Mary Had A Baby.” I picked through the bad, added the best, and rounded out with some delightful renditions of the classics, and ended up with a playlist that feels fresh, fun, and has no weighed down, drawn out version of “Silent Night.” Exit Andy Williams, hello James Brown.
Pop on this playlist for Christmas wrapping, tree decking, light fighting (because there is no other word to describe putting up Christmas lights), and all your holiday festivities, and please let me know how your mom reacts when “Chillin’ On The Beach With My Best Friend Jesus Christ” comes on.