By Leon Collier
Sharing our life with a person we care about comes with a series of challenges, some of which we need to deal with ourselves and others require mutual effort. Some of the challenges are based on our social personality layers, which is why extrovert-introvert relationships need more attention and active involvement to keep both parties happy.
We did some research and came to some interesting pieces of wisdom that could be applied to most extrovert-introvert couples that need a fresh approach.
It’s important to know how wide or narrow is our partner’s comfort zone, whilst communicating our limits. For introverts, self-care moments hold priority over any social activity that’s not essential or overly important. If you understand the boundaries you’ll compromise much easier and avoid tension.
Create a mutual social group
An introvert might find it difficult to adapt to a wide group of friends that come with having an extrovert partner. Therefore it’s not a bad idea to create a mutual social group for those moments when you want to socialize. You could even have different groups for different social activities; it’s up to you as long as it makes you both happy.
Be active together
According to Dr Lisa Firestone’s article in Psychology Today giving in to a routine is one of seven behaviors that negatively affect a relationship. It’s safe to assume that an extrovert needs more activity to enjoy time with an introvert partner. Use time when you are alone to do the things you don’t usually do to keep your relationship versatile. Break your routine with spontaneous expressions of affection.
Learn to say YES
While it might be easy to use the introvert character as an excuse to always stay home and watch TV shows it would be unfair to your extrovert partner. Try and say YES to some things that you would rather pass. You can always turn to your partner later and ask to abort the mission if you can’t handle the pressure or just don’t feel happy.
Always be respectful
While we might understand other people and learn about their conditions or types of personality, we can’t fully comprehend someone else’s experience. Keep this in mind when your partner needs to spend time outside when you don’t feel like it. Also, the other side should understand the partner’s desire to stay in.
An extrovert would enjoy introducing a new partner to friends and family. Those among us who feel like introverts should inform our partners of our unwillingness to meet a large group of people at once. To avoid such surprises both sides should talk about introductions and visits to friends and family.
Be a team
The introvert-extrovert relationship is not something you can set up at the start and follow the rules. It’s important to keep constant communication and discuss how you feel, especially in face of new circumstances. Use the Gottman Method to support each other and check in on each other’s feelings regularly. And be sure to remember that when you hurt your partner you can’t simply heal his feelings by an equal amount of good treatment. It’s easier to prevent hurt than fix it.
Giving up on some things because we wish to avoid an argument is not a good idea; we should be able to ask questions in a relationship. When you want to do something that you’re not sure if your partner would agree with, just ask and the answer might surprise you in a good way! You don’t want to build up the feeling that you’re missing out too often because of your partner.
Introverts aren’t necessarily people who like to cave themselves in; they just like to keep their personal space to themselves. This doesn’t mean you can’t spend time traveling and seeing new places all on your own or with a close group of friends you both feel OK with. According to Sophia Dembling, introverts can be amazing group travelers as much as they can have fun on their own.
Accept one another
Introverts don’t need help to change, most of them don’t feel like changing because they are OK with who they are as well as extroverts. While you might have the feeling that you should help your partner somehow, it’s best if you learn to accept him or her as they are.
These were just some of the tips that could make your relationship much easier. Remember that there is no formula for happiness, only a few guidelines. It’s your relationship and it’s unique but it’s good to be aware of some common principles like the ones we mentioned.
Leon Collier is a blogger from the UK, has years of experience providing the best writing services. When he’s not engaged with dissertation writing services, you can find him behind a book or playing tabletop games with his friends. As an assignment writing service writer and editor and as a dedicated blogger he is also active on Twitter.